|One out of four people is a
chinese. If your father, your mother and your brother are not Chinese, it must be you.
||You don't know the meaning
of the word "fear" - but then again you don't know the meaning of most words.
|Are you free tonight, or
will it cost me? I'm new in town, can you give me directions to your flat?
||Roses are red, violets are
blue, I was born smart & handsome, but what the hell happend to you?
|Today its cool to have small
cars and small computers.Soon it will be cool to have a small penis too.then you my friend
will be THE MAN!!
||The rain makes all things
beautiful.The grass & flowers 2.If rain makes all things beautiful why doesn't it rain
|Hi, how do you like your
eggs in the morning? Scrambled or fertilized?
||Dear God, thank you for
making me healthy. Can you also make me sexy? If you can't make me sexy, please make all
my friends fat. Amen.
|If my head looks like yours,
I'd shave my rear end and walked on my hands.
||On the door of a
toilet....Some people come here to sit and wonder, I come here to shit like thunder!
|How to keep an idiot
entertained *press down* ...... ... .. ........ ..... ......... .. .... How to keep an
idiot entertained *press up*
||I'm popey the sailorman, I'm
member of the klu klux clan, when I pull the triger, I kill a fuc***g nigger. I'm popey
the sailor man, toet toet.
|Mobile phones are the only
things in live of which men talk about having the smallest.
||Wat's the diff between
pulling a curtain and a panty? ANS: When U pull a curtain, it means tat the show is over
but when u pull a panty the show begins...
|A man said 2 his doctor
'everytime I look in the mirror I get an erection' the doctor said 'That's because u look
like a cunt!
||When I was young I begged
God for a bike, but God does not work that way... so I stole a bike and begged for
|Kiss's r blown + kiss's r
wasted kiss's rnt kiss's unless they r tasted, kiss's spread germz + germz hated, so kiss
me BABE im vacinated!
||Nature is a miracle. One
million years ago no one knew people would wear glasses but our ears are at the right spot
|Sorry! Your birth
certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.
||There is hot sex, fast sex,
group sex, safe sex, leather sex, telephone sex and for people wid a face like urs
|Shes down on her knees,Eager
to please,Wid a throb of his nob in her gob,Wid a tingle in his belly,his legs turn to
jelly cos shes doin a good job!
||3 monkeys escaped from the
zoo ... one was caught watching tv ... another playing football and the third one was
caught reading this txt message
|How about you sit on my lap
and we'll talk about the first thing that pops up?
||How women think about sex:At
8 ignore it,Age 18 experience it,Age 28 look 4 it,Age 38 ask 4 it,Age 48 beg 4 it,Age 58
pay 4 it,Age 68 pray it,Age 78 4get it
|I bet when you go to the zoo
you have to buy two tickets: one to get in and another to get out.
||m at the police station.The
police caught me & filed a case against me "possession of good looks".i'm
doomed! i need someone ugly 2 bail me out-so hurry up!
|Please turn your mobile
phone upside down now!!! Hurry 370HSSV 0773H
||Piss the taking is someone
that realise u this like times at its! NOW READ IT BACKWARDS!!
|The fluffy clouds may kiss
the sky, The rose may kiss the butterfly, The morning dew may kiss the grass,But u my
friend can kiss my ass!
Intelligent, spontaneous, good-looking, nice friends, charming, funny, well...Enough about
ME! How about you?
|Mirrors should be able to
think before reflecting the images
||There is: Hot-Sex, Fast-Sex,
Cuddle-Sex, Safe-Sex, Group-Sex, SM-Sex, Telephone-Sex, Cyber-Sex, and for people like
you: NO SEX.
|Hi, I am an alien and I'm
checking for some chicks in your phonebook.. Searching.. Searching.. Searching.. Sorry,no
chicks found! Gay? Conclusion: You Are Gay
||Roses are red violines are
bleu, a face like yours belongs to the zoo
|This sms can only be readed
by someone SEXY:...try again...again...maybe you are just not sexy?...one more time...hey
don't force it ugly!!!
||The NHS regrets to inform
you that your birth was an accident. Please report to your nearest hospital to be put
down. We apologise for any inconvenience
|A man can kiss his wife
goodbye.A flower can kiss a butterfly.Wine can kiss a frosted glass.But u my friend can
kiss my ass! so the world needs YOU after all!
||roses are red, violets are
blue, frankenstein is ugly but what the hell happened to you????